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Overview Video – Influencing with Integrity

I am so fond of our 12 modules of video that I hate replacing them with new footage. Michalangelo’s paintings are still in the Sistine Chapel and it’s been over 400 years, yet my videos are only 20 years old and experts demand I abandon them. Doesn’t seem fair to me.
I’m not saying my videos are comparable to the frescoes in the Sistine Chapel. I’m saying any creative endeavor should last longer than 20 years. Having people say “It’s dated,” really hurts.
However, I am shooting new footage. Here’s some of it.

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How The CEO Lost His Job

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According to the NY Times, “His pedigree seemed impeccable.”  Yet, after 17 months, Ronald B. Johnson, is out of his job at J.C. Penny

Reading the Times account of the 17 months he spent in his new position, from my viewpoint, it is obvious that  he neither knew nor practiced the skills  of a Conscious Leader.  If he had, he would not be reading the Want Ads today.

The easiest and most important Conscious Leader skill is named Win-Win for all stakeholders.  What this means is that a Conscious Leader must be aware of and include in all business  decisions, each group involved.  He must be aware of and seek out the opinions of the investors, the vendors, the customers, and the board.

It looks as if  Mr. Johnson neglected to ask the Chief Financial Officer about the fake snow, light show and flowing liquor at his welcoming party a year ago.  He may have ignored the Fashion Manager when he ordered the European style men’s suits, and he overlooked asking anyone if his swagger was offensive.

Silicon Valley and Texas have different atmospheres. If you move from one to the other, you need awareness, questions, flexibility, and people skills to establish rapport.

It would seem that at Stanford University, Harvard, Target, and Apple, Mr. Johnson would have picked up the absolutely necessary skills for business today. Here are the key ones his behavior did not include.

Rapport:  How to create enough trust for the shared tasks the two of you must complete together.

Outcome  Setting:  How to know what you want and hope to accomplish in see, hear, and feel terms.

Outcome Elicitation:  How to create enough rapport for the other person to let you know their outcome.

Win-Win:  Finding an outcome big enough for both of you to obtain what you want.

Awareness:  Using your eyes, ears, and  subtle body feelings to gather enough information to know what the score is.  Fake snow in  Plano, Texas means something different than fake snow in San Jose.

Creative Thinking: Be adept at “ Enlarging the Pie” and use the 13 new ways to problem solve with your brain,* until they are intuitive.

Listening:  This cannot be taught, only practiced.

Lawsuits:    AVOID  (Especially with Martha Stewart.)

*“Influencing with Integrity,” the book, explains 13 ways to find a solution with your brain.

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An Essential Skill for a Conscious Culture

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The seminar I was overseeing was to certify a Trainer to teach the “Excellence” seminar I had designed on Communication.  The location is Poughkeepsie, New York, and spring is beginning.  Our classroom could have used more heat.  Our students could have used more “Buy In”.

The seminar was proceeding fairly well, except for a few skeptical engineers who thought they already knew everything worth knowing. These two engineers already knew how to communicate with their computers, and people skills didn’t really have much to contribute to their work day.  At least this is the message their facial expressions were sending to me and to the novice trainer.

Kay, the Provisional Trainer, was feeling their resistance more than I was. I had experienced this attitude from engineers before and knew there was a good chance they would turn around before the three days were over.

At noon break on the second day, one of the two resistance experts stopped me and asked, “Do you think this stuff would help me with a problem I’ve been having for months …er..and… months with a colleague in Japan?

“I don’t know.  Tell me the problem and we’ll see what we can do.”  The questioner was a Visual, so I used a word, “see”, from his native language.  “Tell” is an Auditory word, but sometimes useful when you are not positive of the key perceptual system of a new acquaintance.

“I’ve seen lots of  world wide web messages from this person, but never met him. I have no idea if he is Visual, Auditory or Kinesthetic.”

“Good” I thought.  “You have been listening, even while discounting the importance of these skills.”

I needed more information.  “Why do you need to know what he is – VA or K.?”

“Because for ten months we’ve been trying to see eye to eye on which company to select to beta test a new product.   We see this differently.  We cannot agree on a company.  He is difficult. This has been going on so long that IBM is losing money over the delay.”

“Do you have copies of his written messages?”

“Of course.”

“Bring me copies.”

He did, and in two minutes it was obvious the Japanese IBMer was Auditory. His messages were sprinkled with “hear”, “tell”, “talk”, “noisy”, “loud,” “tone”, “discordant” and similar Auditory words. We counted 15 Auditory words.   I marked these out in a red pen, and the answer to the situation  was instantaneous. My questioner was Visual, of course.  Visuals and Auditories  not only speak different languages, but also live in different worlds.  These different worlds are created from data of the preferred system of each  person.  To seek agreements, translating is necessary.

We quickly composed an answer to his latest message, with al the reasons the Japanese IBMer  should go  with the company that my new “convert ” wanted. The reasons were  expressed in Auditory words.

We had an answer back before the end of the day, agreeing to our proposal. I had the winner recount all this to the class.  We passed around the winning message. The remaining  Resistant Engineer capitulated as soon as he heard the tale.  We suddenly had two verbal advocates for the third day of the training.  And a class full of engineers who wanted to learn this magic in sensory language. Communicating with people is harder than communicating with machines.

If you are working on building a Conscious Culture, you need skills for creating rapport and understanding between people  with different perceptual preferences. Such as, all of  us.

In order to create a culture of cooperation, you must learn to speak the others’ languages, whether Visual, Auditory, or Kinesthetic (feelings and actions). Otherwise, they can hear you, but they will never agree with your world view because their perspective and the data they’ve collected over a life time  is so different.   The cultures of Japan and America were not the problem.  The problem was all in the perceptual preferences and the differences in viewpoint that these preferences create.

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